Twenty-three years is a long time. A man could start a business, a family, or foster a community. I don’t remember a whole lot about 1997, but Final Fantasy 7 was a highlight. It would be a gross understatement to say I was excited for Final Fantasy 7 Remake. It’s would also be a gross understatement to say this game is a disappointment. It’s an smorgasbord of bad design choices mixed with a helpful serving of false advertising.
EPISODE TOO: A CALAMITY CALLED MODERNITY
Off top, FF7 Remake isn’t even finished. It’s Episode 1 of many. I don’t inherently think that episodic content is bad, but execution is key. Valve’s Half Life 2 utilized an episodic structure for it’s two expansions to great fanfare. The key difference here is that Half Life 2 released as a complete game. Calling it a remake is misleading. Structural issues aside, the game isn’t that great. I’ll keep this review as spoiler free as possible.
Of Materia & Mundanity
There’s no polite way to say this; this game blows. The pacing is some of the worst I’ve ever seen in a game. The original FF7 has flaws sure, but I don’t remember this much backtracking. One of the strengths of that title was its fairly brisk pacing; akin to a Saturday morning cartoon. The remake is bountiful with poorly-placed side quests, repeat visits to mediocre dungeons, and awkward voice acting. One thing I found interesting was the dialogue had several spelling errors. Not the biggest deal, but when stakes are this high, any small niggle throws a wrench into the engine, so to speak. Remember this?
More importantly, this “remake” feels more like an Alternative Retelling; a new story path carved, with mostly the same characters. The new plot is incoherent dreck. The original game had issues plot-wise, Square-Enix somehow made it worse.
ACTIVE–TIME BELLS AND WHISTLES
FF7 Remake repurposes the Active-Time Battle system of the original game. To be honest, I have mixed feelings about it. A normal difficulty playthrough isn’t balanced. Easy mode is a touch too easy, but some might find it necessary. I appreciate that combat is no longer a cakewalk, but a few tweaks here and there would work wonders.
FF7R focuses on the Midgar. This chapter in the original took 4-5 hours to complete. The remake stretches it out to a whopping 30(!) hours. You should expect a significant amount of downtime and filler. I can’t recall how many times I wandered through the slums of lower Midgar. It’s not particularly something I enjoyed at the best of times. The level design warps and transforms in the later chapters of the game, but that sense of tedium does not. It’s usually a combat-cutscene-run formula with some mini games for good measure. Most games of the cinematic variety follow this structure, but they do so with better gameplay and storytelling. What should have been the manifestation of many a childhood dream is a thoughtless bore.
SENSORY OVERLOAD
FF7R does a few things right however. The visuals and score are to be commended. Series veteran Nobuo Uematsu makes a return for several remixes and rearrangements; culminating in some of his finest work to date. I cannot praise this game enough in that regard. Now that I’m older, great presentation isn’t enough anymore. I want a game that has some teeth.
I’m knee deep in my twenty-first run of the original, and I’m having a hell of a time. Maybe it’s not fair to compare a finished game to an unfinished one, but oh well. Probably best to pick this up on the cheap.
DEVELOPER: SQUARE ENIX
PLATFORM(S): PS4
PRICE: $59.99
AVAILABLE: NOW
Purveyors Of Pixels 